I have been very fortunate in my life in many ways, both in certain aspects of my own family of origin, despite its pathology, and in my culture, despite its pathology.  Although both crushed me to some degree, both allowed me enough remaining connection with myself to keep my head above water – until the time came that I learned to swim on my own, and in my own direction.

The main source from which I draw my ideas is myself – by looking within. It is my life’s devotion, and I totally ascribe to the idea that the answers are all in there, for everyone – if we can find them.  But of course I have been influenced by others on my journey.  In the field of psychology Alice Miller has been a greatly positive influence on me, despite her limits (which I address at length in an essay), but I was already well along the way in having developed my point of view by the time I came across her writings. She did, however, give me validation on certain ideas and helped me crystallize others.

Before Alice Miller I read many other writers, mostly writers of fiction. Most psychology writers haven’t appealed to me much because they’re so defended and confident in the health of their insanity, though I still have read a lot of psychology, which is partially why I feel so confident in criticizing it.  As for fiction writers, I used to love Herman Hesse, for example.  I also got a lot from the writings of Gandhi. I’ve also read a lot about politics, particularly socialism, and while I have a fair number of criticisms of it, I find it provides some wonderful metaphors for the personal journey within.

I have also traveled a lot for long periods of time, and I speak (or spoke) a few different languages, which has offered me perspective and insight into different cultures, some radically different from this western culture. But travel mostly showed me the universal nature of humanity once the veil of culture is stripped away.

I have done a huge amount of work with children of many different cultures in a variety of capacities, and that has given me huge insights into families, and of course the universal dilemmas of children.

And perhaps most importantly I am a psychotherapist, and every day I am provided the privilege of hearing people share their deepest dilemmas and their truest selves. I have an alternate website just for my therapy practice (www.macklertherapy.com), though it is much lighter on content than this site.  My work as a therapist gives me an invaluable chance to better understand what others are going through and to weigh their insights and their experiences and their growth processes and their points of view against my own – and also to contribute to the healing processes of others and to share my gifts in a direct and interpersonal way. This has been radically growth-provoking and satisfying for me.

I also love to read history, I watch the news, and I live out in the world and love to observe it, form hypotheses about it, and test them.  Also, before I ever got into psychology I was trained as a biologist, and I still have a love for animal behavior – and a deep respect for the scientific process, despite its inherent limits.

But to reiterate, I still find that my truest source for data comes from looking within – and feeling this truth. I do my best to listen to my inner voice. Everything else is just external confirmation or challenge. My insights have come as the result of much experience – and much error on my part.  I’ve certainly made a million errors on my path, and studied them again and again, and I’ve waited a long time before taking a step like creating this website and sharing what I have found. I’ve known for years that I’ve been onto the truth, but it wasn’t until more recently that I felt my connection with the truth to be comprehensive and confident enough for me to share it in anything resembling a format that would be useful to others.

I’ve also learned a huge amount from being criticized by others, and taking their criticisms deeply to heart – and weighing them against the truth of my deepest inner voice. Many people’s criticisms of me in my life have been invaluable guides for me to root out my own self-deceptions. I know I still have self-deceptions, but unlike in the past I now have a much clearer idea about what they are, where they came from, and how they play out. In the past I was more at their mercy, because I was much less conscious, and as a result I suffered much more – because I was much more easily fooled into believing that I could “win” through doing what my self-deception told me to do. Now I am not so easily fooled, even if I am still tempted at times.

Another way I learn is by living as healthy a life as I can manage. I try to practice what I preach, and while I am not perfect, I aspire to be – but I do not torture myself into becoming so. I try to be gentle with myself, and I find that if I do this, and strive to stay centered, I keep heading in the right direction and learning more about myself. I live a quiet, calm, simple life, I avoid mind-altering substances and behaviors like the plague, and I do my best to maintain healthy boundaries in all areas of personal conduct.

-Daniel Mackler